like a fire

I recently heard an idea that was new to me and I was so taken back by it that I’m not sure if I agree or not. Basically, if we are created for relationships (I believe we are) then everyone responds to everything out of either fear or love. If that’s true, then every situation we find ourselves in we are faced with the decision to react out of fear or love. In all relationships we act out of fear or love.

I think that if this is true, then it certainly isn’t always a conscious choice. I don’t usually think in every situation about whether I will act out of fear or love, but I can see it play out that way. So I guess what I am getting at is answering the questions, “how conscious can we become of this decision to act?”, “Can we always choose love?”, “Is Love love always better?”

‘Home Grown Church’ 2006

I have always wondered why someone would want to be a part of a house church and this article says a lot. What’s the appeal? I think it is people getting real. Not in the MTV real world way, but in the I don’t know anyone in my church because no one has reached out to me and even when they do it is in a very contrived, religious way.

People need relationships just as much as they need Bible study. If the church doesn’t give them both, then is it any wonder that they form their own groups to get it?

My last post mentions a marketing term called the Long Tail. Basically this is where after the burst of something new and there is a high amplitude/frequency of users, there is a general tapering off of said users into a “long tail” of low amplitude/frequency. The long tail can be a great thing if it ends with more users being effected by the long tail than by the initial start.

My time at camp last week was interrupted for a short time by the long tail. A former student of a church I served at called me up right in the middle of devotion time. I knew who it was and why he was calling, so I answered right away. Jeff was an unlikely disciple. He was a senior the year I started at the church and, though he was a member, he never attended any youth events. He and his best friend went to another church where most of their friends went. After some time at the church, both parents approached me to ask if I could talk their sons into coming to youth group (I won’t even go into parental responsibility here). I invited Jeff and friend to breakfast.

This was the beginning of the discipleship process. We met and talked. I asked them about their lives and they asked me about mine. I didn’t ask them why they weren’t coming and didn’t even bring a Bible. At the end of breakfast, I asked them if they would like to meet again next week. They agreed, to my amazement. We met every week after that until they left for summer jobs. They didn’t come to youth group utnil after attending a reteat that I reluctantly got them to be a part of. So basically I had them at church for about 4 months. What happened those mornings, though, was the beginning of what I think discipleship is truly about.

We didn’t work through the lastest book and often didn’t even have a Bible, though we talked about our faith and what we thought God was doing in our lives. Mostly we just asked each other lots of questions. It is incredible to think back on. God did an amazing work in all of us through that relationship. After they graduated, we still met several times through the year and we talked frequently on the phone. Even though our face time was tapering off, we were still comitted to each other and the growth we had through our relationship to each other.

Five years later, Jeff is graduated and beginning a career. We still talk and share our lives with each other. It’s not because I am a great Bible study leader or teacher and certainly not because I am so holy. The long tail of discipleship happens when people are invested in each others lives for the kingdom. Jeff will always be one of my disciples.

I discipled 5 guys that year. Two are in ministry now and one is still considering it. All five are investing in other guys just as we did at breakfast. This is part of my reasoning for process ministry and explains a bit of my rant about discipleship being more than just Bible study and small group time. It can’t be mass produced or manufactured. Discipleship is the investment of people into each other to help them become more like Christ. That was his example at least and his tail continues.

Creating Passionate Users: Usability through fun

I saw a great article from CPU today that really got me thinking about programming. They had a visual aid with two linked circles, one being usability and the other fun. Where they linked was the place we want to be for users. They draw the very obvious conclusion that the more fun something is, the more likely people are to continue doing it. But what I was thinking of is programming. Specifically programming for youth ministry.

Most youth ministires I see use games to create fun during part of their meeting time and then switch to purpose (or the real reason) for the rest of the meeting. I was wondering how much overlap there was and my thoughts were running toward the not much end of things. Not everything in the church has to be fun, but I wonder why it is so hard to overlap the two.

Shouldn’t professional guys be able to find a way to help teens see how it if fun to get together with others and interact with God and his word?

CPU also makes a point about the difference between fun and funny. Youth ministry has developed a model of being funny during purpose times, which is a bit more fun, but it isn’t the involvement of the kids in the fun like the original idea. Better than just entertaining kids and being funny, we ought to be involving them in the fun of ministry. I love developing a message series and programming. So do a lot of my youth. Involving them in that helps them experience that fun. There are some things I hate doing that others do and would consider fun like developing games.

The point is, we need to evaluate our overlap and maximize as much of that time as possible. I think that is the beginning of the “Long Tail” in ministry where teens continue in their faith even after youth group.

I am in the second day (first full day) of Southland’s middle school camp at Camp Kulaqua. Camp is always a great place to go with no expectations. In fact, the more expectations you have, the less you will probably enjoy camp. I’m having a lot of fun this year lostly because of my expectations. Mostly, I am just trying to spend time with the teens that came with me (and others) and enjoy being around them.

Eric Ball, the speaker spent some time with the leaders today and challenged us to minister to teens from the inside in. Nothing new really, but his passions for meeting every person at camp and praying for them is contagious. I have found myself following his lead in this. Just walking around with my kids and having a prayer on my mind for them. I find myself talking to them more and finding out about what I can pray for them. Another guy here, Trey Gordon, has really challenged me personally in another way. He is a licensed counselor and though not overtly practicing this, he just has a natural empathy for people. So while I pray, I am thinking to myself, what is it that God is doing in this person’s life? What is it that they are really struggling with and needing? I know that I can’t fix that, so I’m just praying for and with them about those things. It’s been a great two days.

Then there was the blob. If you don’t know what a blob is, then you haven’t had a full camp life. Basically a blob is a big bag of air that can act as a transport into the upper reaches of the atmosphere. One person sits on one end and another jumps on the other making the end result someone flying. I have been a part of the blob fun before. Usually I get some 90lb middle schooler trying to make me bounce. Not today. Today I got the Amy Hersman experience. I screamed like an eight year old girl, flailing my arms like a hyper-active windmill and landed flat on my side in fresh 72 degree spring water. To say that it was a shock, wouldn’t come close.

It reminds me of the old commercial where they take a frying pan and an egg and crack it into the pan burning it into an unedible mini frisbee. Until you done camp like this, you haven’t lived the Southland experience.